Hotel reviews – many cautions

Seating in a well reviewed Senegalese hotel

It is sometimes nice to know what to expect when you step off the train in a new place and check in to a hotel in a distant land. In the prehistoric days there were very few reviews and opinions available about hotel premises, tours and services. Truly, it was not that long ago that you had to buy a book, or look at travel agency glossies, or cut out and keep a London Times article to get an idea of what accommodations were like.

Now, of course, the web has made the world into a vast ocean of information and reviews, both professional and amateur, general and specific. I tend to look at reviews of hotels before I book, to catch any red flags, but in truth I am seldom asking for my hotel to provide anything more that a room and perhaps breakfast, so every other detail is irrelevant to me. If you are more of a spa person, or in-house diner, or likely to book a tour or an airport shuttle through a hotel – of course in depth reviews can be informative.

However, ‘Like’ counts, ‘Followers’ tallies, and unfiltered ‘Star ratings’ and opinions are just that. Opinions from people who may have very different expectations and desires. Think Las Vegas – millions of people consider many hotels there an amazing five star heaven, whereas I consider them the third ring of hell. Also, apparently ‘nine out of ten people prefer Pepsi over Coke’ – but I do not care what most people like. (For perspective, I am still shaking my head at a Yelp review of a local Hospital Emergency Room “One star – filled with sick and drunk people – do not go”). My personal experience is that nearly all hotel reviews should be discounted between the equivalent of two and three points out of ten.

I have been lucky enough to visit hotels that have been so beautiful and remarkable that I get a bit teary eyed just recalling them. And, I have stayed in some really awful hotels, and marvel at many of the high marks and the glaring omission of serious red flag situations. My assumption is that many people barely travel at all and are starry eyed over the idea of a hotel, and that many people consider running water and windows to be five star amenities.

Also, there is a natural inclination for grade inflation – if for no other reason that tourists spend money to go to a place, and are loath to publicly acknowledge that the place they chose was awful. Additionally, after you have met the owner of the modest place that you stayed it is that much harder to slam them. Finally, as noted on the AirBnB page – individual reviews may be directly linked to you, owners have your contact information, and have probably already started a dialogue to arrange checkin. This clearly influences upward the ratings.

Getting to the crux – any rating that omits context is worthless. I look for indications of relevant experience: “I travel for business all the time…”; “my family is from…”; “over the years I have stayed X times in…”; “I usually stay in Marriott properties…”. The most useful are “for this price the place is…”; “compared to Y and Z this is…”; “I have slept in hotels 250 nights in the last year, and this was…”. Two reviews like these are worth more than fifty ones without content.

Look specifically for bathroom and breakfast photos and reviews. I really believe that these are the canaries in the coal mine. The ratty surprise in Hargeysa, and the wondrous treats in Klagenfurt are clearly remembered, and that information will be appreciated by potential future guests.

A very common source for reviews is the “Influencer” travel blog, when properties give individuals free accommodation and services in exchange for a review. Their experience at a property will be very different from mine, as they are obviously singled out for special treatment. Their pictures of flowers on their bed, and wine glasses on the table linens just do not resonate with me. Since the writers must consider the potential of future offers of free stuff, I have never seen a less than glowing review. A quick click through their other reviews is likely to reveal an unusual repetition of descriptors like ‘magical’ and ‘unique’.

To generalize on travel blog recommendations – photos and adjectives are virtually free, and both can be used very artfully. I consider most blogs to be travel porn – enjoyable dreaming, happy thoughts, but probably unreal. I have marveled at the pictures of winsome elves posing in front of hotel doorways, and wonder how they managed to get all the rubbish, filth, and street urchins that are in my photo of the same place removed. It seems clear to me that many of ‘the best X in town Y’ recommendations ar actually just ’the only X I visited in Y’. Often words are used euphemistically. Thus: bustling:loud, charming:tiny, authentic:simple, exotic:not Disney, local:dingy.

I really appreciate it when reviewers are honest and clear in descriptions. I have found that many writers from England revel in hewing to the line of right.